All I want for Christmas…

Last week, I plugged in the little portable battery cart to the Montana plane for the first time, then disconnected it after the propeller engines had started.  I think last week was also the first time I got up into the top bays of the big planes; there are these big containers we have to load and push into place there.
On Monday morning, I drove the forklift for the first time because the others had suddenly gone out to the planes, and we still had some pallet stacks to re-arrange.  My re-arrangement was not the most effective — I tipped over two loads.  Monday night was a bit funner, playing Santa.  The supervisor brought in some shrimp and sandwiches for us to snack on as we waited for the last plane.  Monday was really snowy.
On Tuesday, Christmas, we had a great time at home.
…And I got the best present of all later that night:
Answer to my prayers of the entire year.  I saw the face… of what had been an apparition.  I saw demonstration of what had been held by faith.  I saw the living person of one whom I had thought dead.
…She messaged me on Facebook and arranged a time to visit.
Oh, I was terrified, going to that apartment — scared that her coldness of the past year would be repeated in person.  I have had the same face online as in life, and I thought she would too…
But… it wasn’t so.  She showed a kinder face…
How strange, being there, talking to her.  I felt like I was talking to a stranger whom I’d recognized for years but never met.
After a while, the fear subsided, and we talked normally.
We drove around a little, up the peak, then I brought her home and showed her around, and gave her some things from me and my mother.  We ate a little.  Then we went to my grandma’s, where my family was there visiting.  Then, dropped her off.  She also had some cute things to give me and my mother.
I knew, I knew… I hoped and believed and wished and KNEW this time would come.  I’ve waited and waited… and now I’ve seen her face; we talked; we touched hearts.
…And at last, the wait is over, and I have nothing more to wait for.
The wait is over…
I could never think of moving on until I saw her face again.  And now the wait is over…
It is finished…
What a puny, unworthy facsimile I am of the Lord of the earth, the Prince of heaven, who once waited for his great work to be finished…
…But if this is all I can do to follow him… then so it is, and my work too is finished; my cup is all partaken; my sorrow is endured.
God has given me this, the greatest Christmas gift I could have received.  The wait… is over.
…I can move on.
After yesterday, I finally know she belongs no more to me, but to her own new heart.
…I think she’s going for the replacement I mentioned.  She’s spent lots of time with him, including yesterday morning; he’s given nice gifts to her; she prefers his city to this one; and she’s done with him what she assured me she wouldn’t do, in Utah… driving a car. ;p  Ha ha.  It especially hurt to hear that… but since my own guarantee has now been fulfilled, it no longer matters who breaks theirs.
But whether she’s with him or any other… it doesn’t matter to me now.  I’m free…  I’m free…  God gave me this blessing I had waited on; and now for happiness I can rely again on its true Giver instead of on her.
Oh, I do hope she’s happy here.  I got worried hearing that her first church meeting was not pleasant for her.
I’m free… and so my heart can shine freely, to her and to all.  After last night, I have given her everything I had to give; yet I will still do for her welfare whatever I have opportunity to do.  May she be happy here.
Oh… I was buried in tears last night, in bed.
But on my lips… was nothing but gratitude.
Ha ha…
I’m free; it’s over.  Nothing now but to look forward.
I realized I didn’t like her worldly music either. 🙂  Seems his tastes are closer to hers.
Oh, but music aside, it was a blessed and happy night, and I was so thrilled to see her and meet her again.  She is surely a new person; the one I knew is gone forever — I suppose her disappearance will always remain a mystery.  But this one is so nice, in her way.  What a beautiful experience…  I thank my God and I thank her.
Happy Christmas.
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