Monthly Archives: January 2008

Today I saw a dead man… but he seemed more alive than I did.  I need to get away from here…  There’s nothing left…   I’m afraid my faith in everything is gone.  My heart and my head are empty.   … Continue reading →

Some men are so great and so constant, they seem immovable, perpetual; yet the elements wear them all away in the end.  Yesterday and today, the angels came in their billowing chariots to herald with sunbeams the birth of a bright star … Continue reading →

Yesterday I went and met Tugsuu, and we spent the afternoon and evening together.  We talked about stuff…  I commented that we felt more like brother and sister than anything else, and that maybe we weren’t attracted to each other.  … Continue reading →

Hm.   I offered her a ride in the library last night.  She went back to her seat for several minutes…  I figured she was staying there, but I waited for a while, and finally I saw her put her … Continue reading →

Tugsuu…   After we talked last night, I remembered that almost every time I have prayed about girls in the past couple years, my thoughts have at first jumped back to her, thinking that maybe I would want to stay … Continue reading →

Having no friends to whom I could talk, I went to visit Tugsuu.  I left my mother and sister with a final hug…   Her roommate told me she was at work.  I went to the school to call Tugsuu, … Continue reading →

oh heaven, oh hell   first, i know god is just   though my hands or feet move against him, let my tongue no more speak against him   repent and you’ll all be saved   refuse, and you’ll still be … Continue reading →

Unhappy these days… I went to church, but hated it.  I couldn’t stand being there, seeing or talking to anyone.  I thought I might have to change wards………….   I’d have to lay down the calling…   Well, despite that thought, … Continue reading →

Good day today, except I slept in.  I’ve done it about three times this year, I think… missing work…   I’ve missed my other job too, because of general fatigue resulting from spending evening time with that girl.  I guess that’s … Continue reading →

She was rude today…  Actually, I’ve noticed that she criticizes me a lot… but if I ever speak against somebody, she defends them and tells me not to criticize.  I know I started to talk the same way with girls I … Continue reading →